Now that Lauren and I have been in the UK for five years, we’ve decided to apply for an “indefinite leave to remain” — the UK equivalent of a green card. (NOTE TO OUR PARENTS: Yes, we do still plan on moving back to the States at some point. Honest.)

Of course, Her Majesty can’t let in just any riffraff. Before she will grant us leave, we have to take a test on life in the UK–the same test taken by people hoping to become British citizens. For those of you who want to test your Britishness, here are some questions based on the official government study guide. I’ll post the answers in a day or two; in the meantime, if you want to play at home, you can post your guesses in the comment section. (Googling your answers is most definitely not cricket.)

1. Where would you hear the following accents: Geordie; Scouse; Cockney?

2. What is the rule regarding the teaching of religion in state schools?

3. What is the maximum amount that a university may charge per year for tuition fees?

4. By law, how old must you be to work behind the counter of a fish-and-chip shop?

5. What are the nations of the United Kingdom, from most populous to least–and who are their patron saints?

6. How many players are there on the UK rugby team?

7. Where is the original copy of the British Constitution kept?

8. If you notice that everybody on the Tube has paper poppies in their lapels, what time of year is it?

9. What led to the American revolution, and what was the reaction to it in Britain?

10. How did the American colonies win the war?